A Good Husband

A Good Husband
Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his
company's party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks
didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got
home from the party.

As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he had done
something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the
first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of
water on the side table and next to them, a single red rose. Jack sits up
and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly
clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and
cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the
bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the
mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from
his wife in lipstick: 'Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early
to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I
love you, darling! Love, Jillian'

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot
breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His 16 year
old son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, 'Son, what happened last
night?'

'Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind.
You fell over the coffee table and broke it, then you puked in the
hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.' Confused, he
asked his son, 'So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I
have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??'

His son replies, 'Oh, THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom
last night, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed:
'Leave me alone bitch, I'm married!!!'

   Broken Coffee Table $239.99
   Hot Breakfast $4.20
   Two Aspirins $.38
   Saying the right thing, at the right time: PRICELESS